Sungguh tak mudah menjadi pasien penyakit yang mematikan itu, dan makin sulit ketika harus bisa menunjukkan bahwa semua akan baik-baik saja kepada anak sendiri. Namun, Allah sungguh Maha Luar Biasa, memperbolehkanku melewati masa itu dengan kekuatan yang kutahu dari cinta anak-anakku, Mimi salah satunya. Dan apa yang dituliskannya di bawah ini adalah apa yang dia lihat dan rasakan lalu ia tuangkan sebagai bahan ujian praktek bahasa Inggris kelas 9. Baginya menulis dalam bahasa Inggris bukan hal yang sulit, tapi bersikap jujur pada diri sendiri tentu tak mudah.
Dan yang ia tulis di bawah ini melecut hatiku agar selalu eling.
(terimakasih mbak, I love you more...)
I Love You, Mom
It was way back to the year of 2009. I was only 12 at that time. The last year of my elementary school, was filled with having the urge to take care of her. Always making sure I’d always be by her side in the bed. Even studying came second to me. She’s my first and utmost priority.
Yes, her indeed.
That beautiful woman lay on the white sheeted bed, my beloved mother.
Every time, and by that I mean every single time. Every single time me and both of my little sisters came home, we always did have this ritual going. Whole thing started since she came back to our domain from the everything-white-and-medical-scent-hovering-around kingdom. Yes, the hospital. Why, you asked? That monster attacked her. Definitely a monster indeed if I should say so. It was Cancer. That illness never seemed to cease lingering around my beloved mother. I knew she was in pain, and she was incredibly scared.
She’s still alive, indeed.
Because I know, she was fighting, for us.
And God, how I was and am glad to know that fact.
I spent most of those months and years in a particular room I’m so familiar with, at my mother's bedside. Her long fingers were so pale and had felt really fragile as if it would break if I squeezed them too hard. When at last I felt some slight pressure in response, I stared at her eyes. She met my gaze for just a moment before she closes them once again. I don’t know if it’s the antidote, the pain, or just the fact that she was dead tired. Could be all three of them, I never did knew.
I think I should thank to God now, that she’s still alive and much healthier. How she’s like after that monster got to her? She started to pray and believe more to God. Just exactly my prayers from back then and even until now, like they are all granted and it was truly a blessing to have her around again, without having to see her suffering in the bed. I can’t even imagine how she felt. I suppose it would be dreadful, to think that monster is still lingering. Defeated, but lingers, if you know what I mean. Cancer is a horrid disease, it was truly horrible. But even though made my mother’s life changed, it was still bad and I still won’t change my opinion about it. But then again, it seemed to leave trails of path to the right way of life. And now I love my mother even more. She’s truly the most amazing bless given by God to me. The most amazing mother I could ever wish for.
I love you, Mom...
Jakarta 8 Maret 2012
Jakarta 8 Maret 2012
